4 things to always say to a child to boost his/her self-esteem
A child is like a lump of clay. Just like you can mould clay to give shape and craft beautiful pots or toys, you can boost a child’s self-esteem by saying well-chosen precious words. And, of course, wrongly chosen phrases can also down his self-confidence. Hence, what you speak to a child can make or break his future and his personality.
So, remember to choose your words carefully when you speak to a child. It is important not to use blunt phrases to kids. But it is equally relevant to use some positive phrases consistently to help in a child’s growth and enhance his/her self-esteem.
So, here are some things that you must tell a child consistently to boost his/her self-esteem.
Good job, kid. Keep it up!
A child may have produced not so great artwork, but it is his creation that he has put onto the paper. Instead of ridiculing the child for not doing a great job, it is better to congratulate the kid on doing the hard work of putting his thoughts on paper and encourage him to continue challenging himself to produce better work.
When you say positive and affirmative statements such as “Good job, kid. Keep it up!”, you boost the child’s self-esteem. The child is then motivated to produce better work the next time. Gradually, the child will show improvements in his work. But if you criticise the kid, you would discourage him to do that work again with the same energy and enthusiasm. Hence, it is important to encourage a child consistently with positive words or phrases.
Wow, what a smart kid you are
Few parents tend to compare their kids with other children in the hope of motivating their wards to do better. But this forces a child to self-doubt himself, believing that he/she is not smart enough as he/she is being constantly compared. Therefore, it is important to refrain from comparison and call the child smart and intelligent regularly. When a child is referred positively, it subconsciously registers in his/her mind and the kid starts believing so. The same happens when a child is called negatively, and he/she starts doubting himself/herself. Hence, always speak positively to the child and never do a comparison.
Sorry, thank you
When you are courteous to your child, he/she absorbs this quality and uses it in his/her daily life. After all, parents are the first teachers of a child. So, when your kid gets a glass of water for you, remember to say thank you to him/her. This gives a boost to the child’s self-esteem as he or she believes his work has been appreciated.
Also, if you end up not following your promise for some reason, remember to apologise honestly rather than giving up an excuse to make up for it. Kids can tell it when you are faking it up. Hence, do not take them for a ride with fake promises and sorry. If you are apologising for failing to keep a promise and assuring it to do it on another day, make a point to fulfil that task. Otherwise, you end up hurting the child’s self-esteem as he would feel he is not valued.
I love you
Your love for your child should not be based on conditions. Some parents say I love you to their children to get things done. If you use it at the drop of a hat, kids would find out it is your ploy to get work done from them. Say I love you to your child irrespective of the situation, especially when they are down and out. It is then the children need their parents’ love the most and want to hear the three magical words that will boost their self-esteem.