{"id":395,"date":"2020-02-18T02:58:04","date_gmt":"2020-02-18T02:58:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.chandamama.in\/story\/?p=395"},"modified":"2020-02-18T02:58:05","modified_gmt":"2020-02-18T02:58:05","slug":"getting-older-do-you-have-symptoms","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.chandamama.in\/story\/2020\/02\/18\/getting-older-do-you-have-symptoms\/","title":{"rendered":"Getting Older – Do You Have Symptoms?"},"content":{"rendered":"Reading Time: <\/span> 2<\/span> minutes<\/span><\/span>\n
\"Image<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People get out of the way much faster now.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gone are the days when girls used to cook like their mothers. Now they drink like their fathers..<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I didn’t make it to the gym today. That makes it twenty years in a row.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I decided to stop calling the bathroom the ‘John’ and renamed it the ‘Jim’. I feel so much better saying “I went to the Jim this morning”.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Old age is coming at a really bad time. When I was a child I thought \u201cNap Time\u201d was a punishment. Now, as a grown up, it feels like a small vacation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The biggest lie I tell myself is\u2026”I don’t need to write that down, I’ll remember it.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I don’t have grey hair; I have “wisdom highlights” I’m just very wise.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don’t ever ask me to bend down and touch my toes. If God wanted me to touch my toes, He would have put them on my knees.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Last year I joined a support group for procrastinators. We haven’t met yet.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Of course I talk to myself sometimes: when I need expert advice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

At my age “getting lucky” means walking into a room and remembering what I came in there for.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Actually I’m not complaining because I am a Senager. (Senior teenager) <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I have everything that I wanted as a teenager, only 60 years later.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

  • I don\u2019t have to go to school or work.<\/li>
  • I have a driver\u2019s license and my own car.<\/li>
  • I get an allowance every month.<\/li>
  • I have my own ipad (although I can’t recall where I kept it)<\/li>
  • I don\u2019t have a curfew.<\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n

    Life is great.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

    I have more friends I should send this to, but right now I can’t remember their names.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Reading Time: <\/span> 2<\/span> minutes<\/span><\/span>I changed my car horn to gunshot sounds. People get out of the way much faster now. Gone are the days when girls used to…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[50],"tags":[132,56,134,133,131],"class_list":["post-395","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-for-a-smile","tag-getting-old","tag-indian","tag-indianfun","tag-laugh","tag-old"],"amp_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.chandamama.in\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/395","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.chandamama.in\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.chandamama.in\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.chandamama.in\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.chandamama.in\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=395"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.chandamama.in\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/395\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":397,"href":"https:\/\/www.chandamama.in\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/395\/revisions\/397"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.chandamama.in\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=395"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.chandamama.in\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=395"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.chandamama.in\/story\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=395"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}